As I've already mentioned, I am fully recovered from my eating disorder. However, I still struggle with food now and then. Something I've always dealt with is an addiction to sugar.
I know I'm addicted to sugar because I actually get "the itch" for sugar, multiple times a day, including every time I'm done eating a meal. I don't need a full plate of dessert after every meal (though I would LOVE that), I usually need something sweet. For instance, I keep a bag of Dove chocolates in my desk at work to have a few after lunch. At home, I usually have a choice of what sweet item to eat- right now I have cupcakes in the apartment.
If I don't have sugar after every meal, I actually get a little antsy. I will "scavenge" around whichever location I'm in, looking for something sweet. If I'm at work, I most often leave my desk and mosey over to CVS where I buy my fix. Sometimes, it feels as though a meal cannot be completed unless there is dessert too.
One reason I haven't tried to actively end my addiction to sugar is because honestly, I haven't gotten to the point where I really want to give it up yet. (I actually feel like that would be THE WORST). Additionally, it's so socially ingrained into my life too- my family always has desserts whenever I come home, and there's always cake or cookies at each celebration! As someone who is recovered from an eating disorder, I'm also so burned-out from years of dieting and limiting food from my diet, that my "willpower" is officially retired forever. For me, the ability to eat and enjoy all foods again, including ones that used to make me feel "guilty, is a hard-earned victory I am not willing to give up.
Recently I've been actively trying to eat healthier. I look forward to eating salads every day and cooking my dinners. I feel these habits have made me automatically healthier. However, as my lifestyle has improved, the strong desire for sugar after each meal persists.
Does anyone have tips for me? For those who are recovered, is there anything you struggle with as a "survivor"?
Have a wonderful day!