My blog is called “Baby Got Back” for the double meaning (I know, I know, I'm a wordplay dork).
Of course, the first thing people think of when they read the title of the blog is Sir Mix-A-Lot’s song, “Baby Got Back.” No, I did not name this blog after that song. However, the song does celebrate the female body- so, score! When I was brainstorming title ideas and playing around with the concept of body confidence, I kept thinking about booty (who wouldn’t, lol). Eventually, the title Baby Got Back popped into my mind.
The words “Baby Got Back” are so important because they embody the concept of resilience. The primary definition of resilience is, “to recover from difficulties.” The second definition is “the ability of an object to spring back into its original shape.”
To put it simple, resilience is inner strength. When you’re recovering from an eating disorder, an addiction, a break up, an illness or anything, you will most likely have a few setbacks if you’re human (chances are, that's you!). Bottom line? You need resilience to recover from these setbacks.
I think some people are born with more inner strength than others. I also think a person's environment as a child shapes their resilience. Karma might also impact the level of resilience one can possess. While these things are out of your control, I believe that a person can actively increase their inner strength. Here are five ways you can do this.
1) Make more mistakes- People who live “messy” lives have the power to look back on their experiences and try again, with wisdom. Think of each mistake like it's a Fast Pass to your best self. When you make a mistake you have experiential proof that you can survive, learn, regroup and persevere. With each mistake, you learn how to forgive yourself more easily and you become a little more fearless the next time. Please don’t go around intentionally making mistakes- just embrace them when they happen (they’re unavoidable, anyway).
2) Know that everything is temporary- When you’re going through difficulties there will be times you feel downright horrible. It is natural to get scared and think these emotions will stick around forever. If you feel this way, breathe and respect your current feelings for the moment. Bad times are destined to get better. According to Isaac Newton, all actions have an equal and opposite reaction. The lower the low, the higher the upswing. It’s science, dammit!
3) Practice self-care: Sometimes, self-care gets easily confused with expensive “pampering” (Hair-did, nails-did, everything-did). Yes, pampering is a form of self-care but it is not the entirety of it. Self-care can also be drinking tea, lighting candles, taking a bath, reading, journaling, sunbathing, listening to music, baking, buying a new piece of art, cuddling furry friends, taking a walk, dancing, etc. Find what makes you happy and relaxed. Prioritize being kind to yourself.
4) Increase your faith- No matter what you believe in (religiously or spiritually) you must focus on increasing your faith so it is easier to trust the unknown and trust the hard times. When you have faith, you have the ability to take ten steps back and realize it’s all part of a bigger picture designed specifically for your life purpose and to help the functioning of the rest of the world. You don’t need to rely on yourself as much as you think you do.
5) Build a support network- I want readers to know that you do not (and should not) have to go through difficult times alone. In fact, the stronger your support network is, the stronger your inner strength becomes. I know it can be difficult to find support sometimes- maybe you don’t have a strong family or a good group of friends. It’s ok. Take this as an opportunity to get closer to someone new- share your story and open up to a person you can trust. Chances are, they will respect you for your realness and they'll meet you where you need them to. When a person discloses personal information to another, the other person generally feels compelled to share something of equal value (equal disclosure theory). Creating this bond might be a good way to find the support you're looking for.