Growing up I was always fascinated with actors on Broadway. Even at a young age I could feel the passion beaming from their souls when I watched them perform on stage. I knew that to make it on Broadway you had to be the best and that those people most likely worked their butts off to get there. A part of me wished for that passion, drive and success. There was something so fascinating about having "big dreams" and knowing what your end game was ever since you were a kid. I romanticized the crap out of the entire thing. I still kinda do.
Unfortunately a lot of us aren't born with glaringly obvious talents like a beautiful singing voice or the ability to act on stage. Most of us grow up going through the motions. We go to classes and contemplate what our major should be, (math or engineering? English or journalism)? We pick one, hopefully something we're decent at, and hope for the best. The path is unclear, the dreams keep switching, and we really don’t want to get stuck on the wrong path.
Some of us never clarify our passions or discover our calling. That's OK. The worst thing we could do is get hung up on the idea of finding it. It's like what everyone says about finding love. "It comes when you stop looking." You're meant to find it when you find it. The important thing is to have faith it will appear.
So, how do you know you’ve discovered your calling?.
You’ve stopped looking- If you’re questioning your life purpose, you haven’t found it yet. When you find it, things click, things align. What makes you feel excited and energized? Bring more of that into your life.
There’s a really good reason behind the reason- I’ve heard some people describe this as finding your “North Star.” When you’ve found your calling you’ve also found something you value that will drive you down the path. I always say, “I have bigger fish to fry.” I’m not just here to write blog posts and get Instagram followers. I’m here because I want to be a voice for survivors. I feel a magnetic force so strong it leaves me with no other option but to move forward.
You’re patient- When you’ve discovered your calling you understand that your dreams might not come to fruition overnight. Sometimes dreams do happen overnight and that would be wonderful, but you’re also willing to put in the time. Imagine taking an enormous Harry Potter sized chess piece and moving it very far in front of you into the future. You might not know exactly how you will get there but as long as you keep moving forward, you will reach it. That chess piece or reason behind the reason brings patience of great fortitude.
You’re creative with the journey- When you really want something, the journey isn’t completely defined. While parts of it may feel tedious and tiresome, the journey does not feel like an “ends to a means.” It’s a creative process that you like to be playful with. There’s an authentic enjoyment. No foot dragging involved- just gliding/skipping/dancing towards the destination.
It chases you down- In breakups they say if someone really loves you they will come back to you. It’s the same thing here. I quit coaching for good- for 9 months (haha)! I genuinely felt that my relationship with coaching was toast. I was uninspired, burned out and embarrassed. I actually wanted nothing to do with it so I rearranged my life (I got a new job and moved to a new city). Then in the most unexpected way, my life rearranged itself. Enough things shifted that suddenly coaching came knocking on my door again with its suitcase in hand, like an old friend I was finally ready to forgive. Like a phoenix, the rebirth of coaching - as a writer/speaker/advocate reappeared with more clarity and strength. It feels like my calling literally chased me down, it feels karmic. I think that’s how it should work.
Comment below- how did you know when you found your calling? Please share with your friends and family and subscribe!